Ain't Nothing

With my 3-day work week and ideas buzzing about all the time, you'd think there'd be a plethora of posts, right?

Well, obviously --no.

Even the crappy weather we've had (one super-hot and humid day followed by a week of rain)

In fact, I think my posts of late have been more about rambling thoughts and basically getting down any thought that crosses my mindbefore it goes away again. I do have one post I want to do, but I'm finding it difficult to write as it's emotional --and really has nothing to do with me directly.

Sometimes those ideas don't come back.

I think I mentioned my super-high marks for the script I had to write last semester. One of my plans was to expand on the idea further over my "summer" break. It was an idea I had about a comic book and I'd never really put any of it in writing before, but just kept the ideas bouncing back and forth in my head. It's been about 10 years since I've had to do any serious creative writing. I'd written two 1-act plays in college and received high marks for both.

Of course, now the question entering my train of thought is: What have I been doing for the past 10 years???

Getting sidetracked again. I didn't expand on the script or even try to work it out logically as a comic book. I think part of the problem right now is that I have a general plot laid out. I have my characters all together (although some still don't have a backstory) and I know who's doing what and when.

But I also have 3, 4, maybe even 5 beginnings to the story. I'm wondering if it's overkill to fit them into a single issue, basically looking at the event from various points of view. I could do it, but then I'm also missing another vital part of the story. I have the beginning(s), I have the end (actually 2, which means I can make a choice as to where the story goes), but I have nothing in between. I'm thinking that the story would be played out in 12 parts --a year-long story, which fits the plot. But with several points to start from, I could possibly have enough material to begin up to 5 parts of the 12-part story. I know one "beginning" definitely starts quite some time after another. One other start easily can be hinted at in the first part and then expanded into part 2.

Well, like I said: rambling thoughts and one more distraction should do me in for the day. The kids are screaming, so I have to cut this short.

Again.

He's A Very Good Leader

This semester, I'm taking one 'design project' course with 10 of my "classmates" in the program and 5 or 6 other guys apparently in the same program, but at a different campus. They're the entire program and it was easier on the schedule to make them come to us instead of hiring another instructor. As long as they have the commute --fine.

On our first day, we split into small groups to come up with a semester-long project. We'd voice our ideas and then relay them to everyone before voting "Survivor-style" until we had one project remaining.

They picked mine.

No, I hadn't thought it through or anything, it was just off the top of my head, so there's plenty of work to be done. Fortunately, I have 16 people working on it with me.

In the second class, we sat down and met off-and-on for 4 hours to expand on the project and split it into sections so that all 17 of us have something to do. That's when they decided since I'd come up with the original idea, then I'd be the one to make the decisions.

And at that point the instructor said I was to take over the class for the day. So, for a few hours, I was in charge of every little bit --basically meaning I wasn't getting any work done as 16 people had questions as to how they were going to do their part of this project. Not much of a problem. We're all working collectively and I'm there to give direction.

But more than one person noted that I had presence in that room the moment I wanted it.

You know, I really wonder why some people see that in me and others don't. I'm not trying to sound egotistical, because I've been told for years that I have skills pertaining to leadership (I was even elected to lead office in my youth group 4 times which was never done before --or since) In university, I was told by classmates and a couple profs that I was good standing at the front of the room. More than one classmate thought for sure I'd be a teacher some day.

But all I think about is where I last worked and they way I was treated there. When I thought I could 'help' I was shot down. I can recall quite clearly the attitude of one guy when I suggested he make a slight change on the website to reflect software necessary to view some parts of it. I got chided for suggesting such a thing as it had already been implemented.

Bull. He did it right after I suggested it.

I had that a lot where I'd suggest something, get a reprimand for interfering, and then they'd do it anyway.

That sucked. But, I am for the most part over it. I'm not there anymore and never have to deal with them anymore.

Too bad my wife's insisting on working there all the time now.

One Week

Fine, it's been a week since I last posted but the illness did me in during my first week back at school. My "break" seemed to be over in a blink and suddenly I'm back at it.

Apologies for the rambling thoughts below...

The workload for the second quarter of my program is definitely lighter. I've had 2 hours' homework from the first week. Last quarter, after the first week, I had 20+ hours... I also managed (yay!) to condense my schedule into 3 days a week instead of 4 or more. I had 3 half-days and one full day. I now have 2 full days and one half day (can't be avoided). Basically, it means one more day at home to work on eBay stuff (yay?) and even more important: 120km (80 miles for my American friends) are now knocked OFF my weekly commute. Between stop-start traffic and the distance, that's the equivalent of half a tank of gas too!

I applied for work at school too. I scheduled a sit-down with the employment advisor to see my option for finding work around my school schedule and she misunderstood me to mean "finding work AROUND THE SCHOOL." No matter, there's 2 jobs available that I'd be happy to do on the days I'm there already for class. It would be great if everything worked out. More money = always good!

One of my classes is 'Life Drawing' which basically means staring at a naked body for 3-4 hours. And, yeah, we had a guy on the first day. Not really an issue (the benefits of being "mature") until I saw him one moment in shorts and grabbed my supplies to draw and looked up to see.... well, you know. The instructor did ask where my training in life drawing had been before (thinking maybe I'd gone to an art school beforehand like one of my classmates) and I admitted I'd never had any formal training (no training at all actually) in life drawing. These teachers are very skilled at stroking the ego, that's for sure!!

I just finished posting a message on another list and it stirred up quite a few memories from senior high. Kinda strange, because it's been nearly 15 years since I graduated from high shool and some of my friends I haven't thought if in... nearly 15 years!!

It's July 11 and we've had more than the average July rainfall already. It's looking like a sucky July to be sure. It's sunny at the moment, but a closer look also shows the light rain falling at the same time. Crap. Wrote "sunny" and now it's disappeared behind more rainclouds.... It's the mix of sun and rain that makes the veggies in our garden either die or -like our celery and rhubarb- grow to over six feet in height.

There's a rabbit eating the taller grass in our front lawn. He's definitely wild... he's got that look in his eyes.

STILL playing the addicting online game. My skills haven't improved much, but there's definite progress everytime I play. I'd be playing right now, but I'm watching my darling children instead. So, instead, while I'm "watching" them (they're transfixed with cartoons at the moment) I'm researching different aspects of the game and... writing about really useless stuff.

Yay me.

OK, I've run out of useless things to talk about.

Terrorist Threats

REALLY not feeling great today (too much sun yesterday? Ah, the irony), but I had to type this 'cuz I have to get it out of my system.

I finally figured out how to get Osama Bin Laden out of hiding.

I'm going to send him my son.

Osama won't last the day with the little terrorist.

I have to go. He's screaming again.

My son, not Osama....

Stormy Weather

I've had the proverbial raincloud solely over my head this week. Too bad, really, because tonight is "date night" (finally) for my wife & I for our anniversary (which happens next week, but I'll be back in school by then).

I've always been told "never write angry," but I think writing angry brings out a whole new level of passion, yes?

You know you're in a foul mood when you're swearing at church...

See, I'd been "volunteered" (I once heard 'volunTOLD' is a much more accurate term) to help out with the kids' Sunday School stuff for a couple of weekends over the summer and I'm not really into kids. I know, I know. I have two of my own, but they're not normal kids. My daughter is reading, drawing like crazy and fully prepped for kindergarten in the Fall (she's also quite interested in seeing 'Narnia' this Christmas because she likes the story --and recounted about half of it to me one evening). My son, not quite 2, has a vocabulary nearing 500 words. I had a boy in the Sunday school class who just had his 4th birthday and I had no clue what he was trying to say. He has a very small vocabulary... Anyway, NOT a kid person and Sunday was not a day I was looking forward to.

Even worse, my wife had forgotten a bunch of things. I volunteered to get home immediately and pick it up, but she stopped me to (I don't know why) lecture me on a bunch of things first.

If only she hadn't lectured me.

I got into the car, pulled out and headed around the corner of the lot only to hear screeching tires as someone laid on the brakes.

Hard.

'V', who I swear will kill me one of these days, was speeding through the parking lot to get to church. Yes, she was a little late, but people don't go to Hell for coming to church late. Nope, they go to Hell for needlessly killing people. Killing someone in a church parking lot just adds to the irony.

Anyway, it's not the first time I've had a "close call" with V. It's the 4th time in 2 years she's nearly gotten me in the parking lot. The worst was one time when I had just pulled out of the lot onto the street and after checking for traffic, made my right turn --almost right into her car as it sped down the wrong side of the road to pull into the lot.

So I had a quite a number of choice words with her in the parking lot. The stuff at home could wait. This woman needed to hear a few things first.

What if I'd been walking in the lot and she was speeding like that?

What if it was one of the seniors walking past?

What if it was one of my kids? Church, to me, should be one of the safest places to take my kids. Don't make me wrong on this.

Well, that was Sunday.

Yesterday I needed to take my car in for servicing. Yesterday was the first day I actually regretted buying the car. 673 freaking dollars later, I was fuming. What-O-what is the warranty for again????? I got rid of my old car because I was sick of paying $2000 a year in repairs on it. In 2005, I'm already up to $800+ and it's still JUNE. I also wasn't feeling too good and really just felt like sleeping. I didn't want to have to wait for my car from 8am until after Noon. A coffee at Starbucks can only last so long...

Since I wasn't feeling too hot, I went to bed early last night, feeling the garbage could wait until morning.

Turns out I got to sleep a little longer than normal and got up just before 9am.

And the garbage men had been and gone already.

So, lesson learned, right?

It's the second time this year that I've missed getting the garbage out before 9:30 and the second time they've come by before 9. Normally, they come between 1 and 5... nice schedule and way to keep at it, boys!!

So, I condensed the trash into one bag and tossed it in the trunk of the now-$673 "richer" car and drove around town until I found the following:
1 - a house with trash at the curb.
2 - a house that looked like no one was home.
3 - a house that looked like it could use another bag... :-)

Oh, I also discovered one of the carpet staples my cats had clawed out of the stairs. It sliced into my big toe right underneath the nail. It was quite the slice and bled like you wouldn't believe...

How many days left this week?

Tools

I guess I can't actually say I've wasted all my time this week. I power washed our driveway and concrete that loops around the house. In all, it took close to 6 hours to get it done.

I borrowed my father-in-law's pressure washer to do it. The one I "inherited" shoots out a stream less than the circumference of a dime. Washing a driveway that's close to 40 feet wide at it's widest and over 30 feet long. And that doesn't include the 30' x 15' slab at the side of the house I'm assuming was meant to park an RV, but now is home to our kids' toys. AND there's more concrete around back...

Needless to say, neither my wife nor my father-in-law could figure out why it was taking me so long to finish up. My "FIL" finished his driveway in an hour. But he's only got a 20'x20' slab to do.

It's done now, so now I only have to listen to my wife ask what I did with my day yesterday...

Big Distraction

Oh good Lord, I'm procrastinating right now...

It's not that I'm supposed to be doing anything right now --I still have a week off from school-- but I'd planned on getting a bunch of things on eBay this past weekend in order to have the money come in and have everything shipped --sans distractions-- before school starts again.

Whoops.

Last weekend proved too busy. So, I planned on Thursday. Didn't make it, so now I plan on doing some eBay stuff for Sunday. The only problem is that now they'll be ending July 3rd (any Americans actually stay home on the July 4th weekend???) and while I was hoping for $800+ for these, I'll be lucky if it's more like $500+...

Damn.

That, and I've suddenly discovered a skill I'm more than moderately good at in 'Ultima Online.' "UO" is what is called a MMORPG or Massively Multiplayer Online Role Playing Game. Anyway, it's a medieval-style game and one of my characters showed an affinity towards... of all things... fishing. Yep, send the line out and pull it back in... I've just caught a fish...

Basically, the skill of 'fishing' is rated out of 100. All characters (most characters) start out with ZERO skill points, but it can easily climb with a few attempts at fishing. Of course, you need money to buy a boat and sail the seas. Done that. I found a website that lists the different things that happen as you skill climbs. When you hit '10' you start catching fish. Below 10 you find a lot of boots . Once you hit 65, you can start deepsea fishing. AND, at 65 you can start searching for sunken treasure. How do you find sunken treasure? Well, at 100 you can start pulling up messages in bottles.... so it's best to buy them off other players for now. At 80... you can grab special fishing nets (which mainly just bring up really nasty sea monsters) and BIG FISH. Okay, so I'm playing to get to the BIG FISH. There's a website dedicated to them...

Hehe.

The problem is that the skill doesn't continuously climb. Nope, it goes in spurts and although an article written a couple year's back says you can get to 100 in 30 hours... I've had the game running basically for 100+ hours and am now at 69.4. Yes, there are MACRO keys and I have one running but it still needs regular "check-ups" and character moves to continue "climbing." Very tiring. VERY tiring.

Right now I'm trying for my second sunken treasure chest. Haven't found it yet, but only been trying for about 2 and a half hours.... So very tired.

Even worse... You know you've procrastinated too much when it's suddenly 8:30pm on Friday and you still think it's Thursday... Oh crap!

I planned on 97 things to start on Thursday and another 100+ on Sunday. So far, 21 of the original 97 are ready to go. Ugh. Good thing tomorrow's... Saturday, right?

Lump

Still recovering from Father's Day.

I know, it sounds stupid. Why would anyone have to recover from Father's Day?

I think I went through a similar thing last year where the only thought I had running through my head was:

"Father's Day would be so much better without the kids..."

OK, not completely true. My daughter was fairly good, although she's discovered "embarrassment" and let me tell you. Embarrassing moments and 5-year old girls go hand-in-hand. So, she'd drop something and it would break. She'd cry and whine for a while.... Oog.

My SON, on the other hand...

Let's put it this way. My daughter's "terrible two's" didn't hit until she was almost 3. We always joked that she'd saved the terribles but they'd arrived with interest.

My son's impatient. He's started his terribles early.

And they've struck with a vengeance. He's basically been screaming since early (***eeeaaarrrlllyyy***) Sunday morning. He's been mean to his sister, hitting her and pulling her hair. He's been rough on my wife --again with the hair. And he's been slamming toy cars into my shins which at first was annoying but the purply-blue bruise now hurts when he whacks it with a Hot Wheels.

And that's basically it. Bruised. A little sunburnt (from pressure washing our driveway today --beofre the thunderstorms rolled in from Seattle). Got a great picture of the full moon last night which I have to get developed before I can share. And, otherwise, just getting addicted to Ultima Online. Again.

Married to a Memory

So, I thought I'd go for a joke about the wedding and throw in a "Graduate" style banging on glass and convincing her to run off with me...

But something even more interesting happened instead.

I had to go to school first, what with today being the last day of the semester and all. So, I warned the instructor I'd be leaving early to get to Sex Caffeine's wedding. I handed in my last assignment (my 3rd 100% assignment in a row in that class) and said my goodbyes to everyone and off I went!

Only to discover my keys were locked inside the frickin' car.

I tried calling my wife, but only got the voicemail. Left a message, but told her I'd see what I could do in the meantime.

Fortune favours every once in a while and it just so happened that 'H,' which not only stands for her real name, but can also rightly stand for "hottie" 'cuz she IS the hottie at school; was picking up her marks. We're not in the same program, but we were in a couple of courses together. We talked about my boo-boo (the one day I don't use the keychain doorlock!!) with the car and that I'm kinda in a rush to get to the wedding (almost an hour's drive away and it starts in 40 minutes!).

So she offered to get me to the wedding.

On her motorcycle.

She quickly whipped home to get the second helmet (I just prayed it wasn't a funky disco helmet and was quite relieved to see a pretty awesome dragon head instead) and returned within minutes. So, I left another message for my wife and climbed on the motorcycle.

And like a bat outta Hell, we were off!

Made it to the wedding on time. H stayed with me and offered to drive me home after the wedding for the spare keys and then back to school for my car. No problem, right?

OK, slight problem. Sex Caffeine is, among other things, someone I used to work with. That meant there were several people, whom I used to work with, at the wedding. Several people who know me quite well. Who know me and my wife quite well.

And here I am with a total hottie, climbing off a motorcycle.

So, yeah, good wedding. Quite a number of stares at H & I. (still shaking my head) And I'm ure there will be quite the number of conversations on Monday at my old office. H & I have already agreed to collaborate on our graduating project. My program automatically puts me in the creative leader for my group, so this could be interesting. H actually referred to me as her boss to one person asking why she was at the wedding. Thank God it was casual, since she was in leather...

Ssssooooo.... moving on...

My old boss, Big Mama, was there. She was desperate to know what had happened when I left. I promised to tell her some other time (just basically guaranteed myself a free lunch). One of the ladies who had originally started the whole affair rumor between Sex Caffeine & I was there as well and I'm sure she was antsy as anything waiting to tell someone... *anyone* about the woman I was with.

Ah, I may have been gone from the office for 8 months now, but my reputation won't die easily.

Let's Talk About Sex

I realized it's been a long and drawn out thing, the whole Sex Caffeine saga. Seriously, like my 3rd or 4th post started the whole saga.

I'll have some free time next week, so maybe I'll be a good boy and compile a list of the posts dealing with the SC Saga.

Stay tuned...

Any Fool Can Say Goodbye

The Sex Caffeine Saga is coming to a close officially tomorrow. She's getting married and finally brings closure to our near-relationship. Yes, I'm still a little surprised I was invited to the wedding. I'm still going to school for 1pm and "make an appearance" before hauling tush to the wedding. It may take me an hour to get there, so I asked SC to talk slowly.

I have to admit I put in a CD for the drive home from school today that was laced with songs that remind me of the time we spent together. So, yeah, a little down. If you can, listen to Rosie Thomas' "All My Life" and you'll get the idea of the songs going through my head.

Despite the craziness at the "double" end of our relationship, and the fact I still refer to her as "Sex Caffeine" (in reference to the first craziness), I now only recall clearly the good times.

And yep, I feel guilty for the strain I put on my marriage while I acted like a complete and total idiot.

So stupid.

June 26th actually marks 3 years (3 years!!!!???!!!) since Sex Caffeine & I first met. June 18th marks what should be the last time I see her.

I think.

I Ain't Missing You At All

It's been almost 9 months since I left the office from Hell and I finally figured out something that I miss from the office. The view:



This was taken at about 6:55am on my last day in that office. Nice, eh?

Superficial

My 3 mega-major term projects are now complete and I can breathe a little easier heading into the "weekend." I still have 2 assignments due, but they're both weighted as minor ones. Phew.

Still have 3 classes in total to go to.

One is for the writing class and we were told a week ahead of time that our term project (worth 30% of the mark in a program where a "pass" is 70%) was due in a week instead of the planned/prioritized 2 weeks. I also had an extra-credit assignment due to get rid of my one 'C' out of the 6 essays we did. Fortunately, I got an 'A' on the extra-credit assignment. Double-phew!

We had, for our animation class, until 12:30 yesterday to complete our final 10-second animation. Mine was 12 seconds and completed at 3am on Monday morning. 16 of 25 people had theirs complete before class started and the instructor was completely speechless. Apparently, that just doesn't happen and he expected a scramble of students trying to finish off their work in time. Submission at 12:31pm was an automatic fail for the semester....
Triple-phew!

My mean-and-nasty-and-I-really-hate-going class had the final exam and final presentation this morning. We had to design a post-modern building using 2 artistic influences (the instructor picked the artist and architecture for us). I did a cafe based on the Roman Colosseum and the style of Vincent Van Gogh. The guy who presented before me failed his Egyptian pyramid-style/Otomo (sp?) influenced building because he didn't have any windows. and that his ornate designs on the side of the building were all "superficial." He asked her what she meant by that (we all know it basically means "trivial") and she said if it could be painted over, it was superficial. He got 53% for his work. I got 88% on mine, but lost marks because Van Gogh's influence was consdered, by her, "superficial." The windows were based on Van Gogh's Starry Night with a spiral design. So, I asked her if she thought someone might paint over the windows or if she thought a building influenced by such an open-air building as the Colosseum didn't need windows. She just glared at me and had the next presenter start. So glad that's over and done!
Gazillion-phews!!!

All This and Nothing

I haven't slept enough this week as "the push" to finals has begun. Actually, I have one final project already submitted and the biggest-of-the-big is due 12:30 on Monday. I keep saying I'm about 95% done, until I look at it again and realize it's about 75% done. I'd say 50% of it was done in class, so about 7 or 8 hours' total.

One of my courses is tough and I don't mean the educational "tough." It's just tough getting out of bed to go and I'm glad it's done on Tuesday. I really didn't enjoy the class. Too damn smart for it, I say.

Too smart, but the exhaustion's getting to me: I misspelled "OUT" on worksheet today. Designing a new soda company logo. I called it "Out Cola" and the first comment I got was "where's the closet?" Of course, then I noticed I'd actually called it "Ot Cola." Damn lack of sleep...

It's now called KO Cola. But that's a story for another day and another blog...

How tired am I? The big question burning my brain right now is this:

If "Mr. Britney Spears" Kevin Federline is honestly going by the name K-Fed, why-oh-why can I not read that properly?
Seriously. I don't see K-Fed at all...
Nope.
I see F-ked.

And then I giggle.

I really need to go to sleep now.

Character Assassination

Was watching The Daily Show with Jon Stewart the other night (it's finally on in Canada at 12:05am...) and there was a bit on W. Mark Felt, AKA Deepthroat. His grandson was commenting on how Felt should be regarded as an American hero.

(I could go off on a tangent here about how I feel about Americans and their concept of heroes, but hey whatever gets your patriotism going...)

But, as Stewart points out, it's one thing for a family member to praise your actions and character. It's something else to view who decides it's time for some character assassination. For W. Mark Felt, there were 3 people highlighted who feel Felt did more harm than good: G. Gordon Liddy, Pat Buchanan, and Robert Novack.

Liddy himself went to prison over his role in Watergate. Buchanan was one of Nixon's aides, and Robert Novack just might be "known" only for outing an undercover CIA agent in a newspaper for political revenge. As Stewart calls him, Novack is "a douchebag of liberty."

So, if these are the guys who hate Felt, you really can't help but like the man.

And it got me to thinking... I know of 3 people who truly hate me. Total hate. Not a "I'm don't know about that guy," but people who would celebrate my pain and suffering if something ever happened to me. I'm talking HATE here.

Three people:
1. My old boss From Hell
2. Drama Queen (the ultimate Co-Worker From Hell who came into my new office on a daily basis to see if I'd left for good yet)
3. The Curse (the first in a long line of Co-Workers From Hell in the department From Hell --and retired early instead of working another 30-minute 'day' with me)

I feel so much better about myself!!

Two Young Kids

My wife is working this morning, so my mega-schoolwork time is being cut into as I take on the Daddy role again for a few more hours.

I know people say TV is bad for kids --especially A LOT of TV, but there are times wehn it's necessary. Like when a father was working hard on schoolwork until after 3am and then got up at 7am to take care of the children. "Take care" in this situation means make sure there's food in their stomachs, they're dressed (by 10am at least) and that they're preoccupied while I attempt to:
1. Eat
2. Drink coffee (to wake up)
3. Get the garbage out
4. Try and shower

My son has serious abandonment issues (no idea why) so he needs to be distracted if the lone parent is going to shower. After bugging one of my classmates who is at school Tuesday thru Friday without going home (for a shower or anything), I think I'd better shower at least once before heading to class tomorrow morning.

The boy is fed and seems happy eating fruit leather and a couple of arrowroots (he had Crispix for breakfast, don't worry), so I might just get that shower in yet!!

Oh, one more thing. I heard this last night and thought it interesting enough to share. Apparently, studies show that when a child is born, their frontal lobe synapses form just before birth. The synapses require human touch in order to fully function and if the child isn't held within an hour(? more? Can't recall the exact amount of time) then these synapses shut down and die. Desire for human contact dies within hours of birth if something isn't done. Essentially, this leads to social deviancy and no social skills while growing up.

Makes me happy I got to hold my kids immediately after each was born. This came up during a discussion about some friends who had a baby boy early last Saturday. He's adorable --and light!!

Every Genius Has Their Hang Ups

I am so smart! I am so smart! S-M-R-T! I mean S-M-A-R-T!
~~Homer J. Simpson

Your IQ Is 140

Your Logical Intelligence is Genius Your Verbal Intelligence is Genius Your Mathematical Intelligence is Genius Your General Knowledge is Genius

A Quick and Dirty IQ Test

Closing Time

I'm about 75% of the way through 2 of my 5 finals. About 50% through another and have 2 more finals I still know nothing about. But I do have 2 assignments still due in those classes before we even get the information on the final.

But I did get some good news today. I asked the instructor for the Saturday class if it's possible for me just to drop off my final assignment and "hang" for a few minutes before bolting to the wedding.

He's fine with it, so I'm going to get my closure with Sex Caffeine.

Finally.

Naked Pictures

I know, I know... I just blogged saying I'd be too busy with schoolwork, but I had to share this little tidbit...

The Boy (whom some of who you will remember from the Job From Hell saga) emailed me a bunch of pictures from some porn site. The woman bears a striking resemblance to Sex Caffeine (who kicked off the My Year saga).

And I mean a striking resemblance to her...

It's not her, but there are a good number of similarities: build, smile, hairstyle... endowments. Kinda frightening in some ways.

Now, if only I was strong enough to hit the delete button...

Little Bits

Pissy mood today, brought on by lack of sleep and prospect of little-to-no sleep over the next few days, dammit!

1. Was up until 2am doing homework. I'm not leaving things until the last minute, but they take that long... Was due at 8:30am and I had to get up at 5:30.
2. A major part of my route has been closed for the past few days. Well, at least that's what the signs and barricades say. People still use the road and get through to the other freakin' side faster than those of us abiding the law.
3. Finally got the information sheet on our term paper in the writing class. It's worth 40% of our mark and due NEXT FRIDAY (a week earlier than originally scheduled). That didn't help my mood.
4. Still waiting to hear on the final assignments for 2 of my 5 courses this semester. T-minus 2 weeks to go.
5. I may be a little quiet over the next week or so as I try and get caught up on all this work.
6. Only typed 17 pages yesterday and hoping for 8 or so tonight. Tomorrow's assignment is, fortunately, already done.
7. 25% of my final due a week next Monday is done.
8. 10% of my final due a week next Tuesday is done.
9. 2.5% of my final due next week is done. Shite.
10. Aaaannnndddd a big 0% for the other 2 'cuz I don't know anything about them yet.

Urgh.

40 Stories

Thanks Mad!
(I know, you stole it from someone else...)

40 Questions Asked and Answered

[Stolen from One With Cat.]

1. My uncle once: dropped a bomb and blew up a whale in the St. Lawrence River. He thought it was a German sub surfacing...

2. Never in my life: have I done drugs.

3. When I was five: I looked up my teacher's dress when she sat down.

4. High School was: according to my yearbook, a great "4 years." Um, it was actually 5 years (I was at the same school from Gr. 8-12)

5. I will never forget: My first love

6. I once met: Vincent Price.


7. There’s this girl I know: who almost always wears low-cut tops in class. She's very distracting!

8. Once, at a bar: I was the only white guy. And, I was 15 at the time. Oh, AND I thought I as going to die from the looks I got.

9. By noon I’m usually: getting a headache from my kids.

10. Last night: I was on Blog Explosion 'til 1.

11. If I only had: a job I could be proud of.

12. Next time I go to church: will be on Sunday.

13. Terry Schiavo: died tragically.

14. What worries me most: is finding out I've done something else wrong.

15. When I turn my head left, I see: a poster with an Oscar Wilde quote:

"We are all in the gutter, but some of us are looking at the stars."

16. When I turn my head right: a copy of All-Star Comics #11, which would be worth $3300 in better condition. It's right now worth about $200...


17. You know I’m lying when: I talk about being successful having sex. (I've almost forgotten what it's like).

18. What I miss most about the eighties: My First Love, and my first major crush.

19. If I was a character written by Shakespeare, I’d be: Dogberry. Thinking I'm in charge, but only of a bunch of nincompoops (who says that anymore?) and then I just end up stabbing myself in the foot with my own sword.

20. By this time next year: I'll be counting the weeks 'til I graduate from school! Again!!

21. A better name for me would be: O Mighty One ;-)

22. I have a hard time understanding: What my freakin' design class has to do with the program I'm in.

23. If I ever go back to school I’ll: What? Again? Oh dear Lord, no more school!! Actually, I'd probably go for my coaching certification. I'm going to be involved in my kids' sporting activities.

24. You know I like you if: I tease you or (if we're in person) I pat you on the shoulder and give you a compliment.

25. If I won an award, the first person I’d thank would be: My wife. Our couch isn't very comfortable.

26. Darwin, Mozart, Slim Pickens & Geraldine Ferraro: Well, 3 are musicians and Ferraro tried to be Vice President in the 80s.... or was she running for Pres with Walter Mondale as VP? Why do I know this?

27. Take my advice: I deserve a small portion of your money. Feed me.

28. My ideal breakfast is: Cold pizza. The only time it's as good as piping hot is when it's very cold --not "warm". I want pizza right now.

29. A song I love, but do not have is: One of U2's latest hits. Can't remember the name of it right now (or I'd have it, hello?).

30. If you visit my hometown, I suggest: you come in July, specifically July 1st when there's a big party at the park for Canada Day and people cheer everyone getting their Canadian citizenship. If it's been a good spring, then the strawberries are ripe enough to eat and raspberries are right aorund the corner. The sun is shining and doesn't set until close to 10pm and it's 34 degrees Celsius outside (93.2 F).

31. Tulips, character flaws, microchips & track stars: 1. Are grown in a very large field about 20 miles from here. 2. Are common to everyone (nobody's perfect). 3. Fried my last computer. 4. Have become a disgrace at the Olympics with all the steroid use.

32. Why won’t people: give me money!?!?!?!

33. If you spend the night at my house: you'll never forgive me for sleeping on my couch --or you're still awake because the hide-a-bed's about 7 feet away form this computer. Sorry.

34. I’d stop my wedding for: my wife. 'Cuz boy woudl i hear about it!!

35. The world could do without: Any more bloody political blogs. Getting sick of 'em.

36. I’d rather lick the belly of a cockroach than: go back to my old job. :-)

37. My favorite blonde is: my first love.

38. Paper clips are: sitting in the bottom of my backpack. The container broke.

39. If I do anything well, it’s: Fighting my way through 98% of the crap, only to have another pile of crap dumped on me.

40. And by the way... I'm totally procrastinating right now!!

Beautiful

So, Miss Universe 2005 is a fellow Hoser, eh? Beauty.

I do have a question though. When was the last time there was actually a 'Miss Canada' pageant held? Apparently it's been 13 years since it was televised, so I had no idea it was even still happening!!

I know it used to be that there wasn't a "Miss British Columbia" sent to Miss Canada, but instead a "Miss PNE" (Pacific National Exhibition). Back in the late 1980s and early '90s I actually went to school with 3 Miss PNEs. Must've been something in the water at that high school.

That reminds me... I had a bit of a crush in high school on a girl who used to look like Kylie Minogue

or at least what Kylie Minogue looked like back in the 80s!!

Let the Music Play

OK, procrastinating now... hand is sore from drawing.

I came across something like this on one of the BE blogs today and thought I'd give it a try. Basically, you listen to 20 random songs on your PC and write out the first line of each song. Then let people guess the song!

Oh, and no cheating by googling the lyrics!!

So, here goes:

1. Another head hangs lowly
   
2. While there is time
   
3. You say you want
4. Grandfather watches the grandfather clock
5. Oh Elise, it doesn't matter what you say
6. Out in the door just in time
7. Planned a Show
8. In the mist
9. Lake light
10. Wait, wait, I never had a chance to love you
11. Our love is like water
12. I walked along the avenue
13. Sun is shining in the sky
14. When lights go down, I see no reason
15. And when I wake up in the morning
16. Go ahead with your dreamin'
17. Dealers keep dealin'
18. It glittered and it gleamed
19. As he came into the window
20. Remember boy that your forefathers died.

Good luck!

I'll admit I skipped a couple of songs simply because they were either instrumental, started with the title of the song, ~or~ were leftovers from an experimental download of international music (with a group called Lele, so there).

I'll post the song list as an addendum in a few days...

Boom Boom

I'll admit I'm a bit addicted to Blog Explosion. In fact, I have a feeling most people reading this right now are viewing it because they came through 'BE.'

So, hey.

I have BE running (Blog Rocket too!) while I do my homework and use it as my sanity breaks. And 90% of the time it actually helps. I've found about a dozen or so blogs I enjoy reading now, so THANKS for all those bloggers out there who are visiting!!

Oh, and Dreama: Your blog finally came up during yesterday's BE.

Time Is Wasting

The one good thing about writing assignments coming due is it gives me an excuse to watch all these movies on the computer.

FYI, 50% of my computer screen hold the Media Player and the other 50% is for Word, FrontPage... Firefox. :-) The benefits of a 19" screen, yes?

I went out and picked up 'Ferris Bueller's Day Off' for $6 the other day. I love this movie!! It's just way too funny!

I remember a bit on Saturday Night Live's Weekend Update with Dennis Miller. Downtown Chicago had flooded from some broken pipes or something and entire city blocks had been shut down. Dennis Miller said that they had a suspect for the broken pipes: Ferris Bueller.

I'd heard once there was going to be a sequel after he got out of college and started working. I guess nothing ever became of it.

How's this for wasting time instead of writing for school?

Little Man You've Had a Busy Day

Alright, my son's been a busy boy and refused to have his afternoon nap for me again today. This really sucks because he has this look like:
"Yeah, you could be working, but I'd rather slap you in the face for the next 10 minutes or so."
Little punk.

But today was actually a very very busy day for my daughter. She had her graduation ceremony from pre-school today as well as the season-ending ballet recital. We had lunch with all the grandparents in between, so she was a pooped princess in a flower costume by the time she made it home.

No, I wasn't at the recital as someone needed to take care of the little punk of a boy.

Next year --when hopefully I'm not as busy myself.

Is This the End?

Oops! Sounds ominous, but I'm not talking about quitting this blog or anything!!

Let's just say it's that time of year as we watch all our fave TV shows come to a close for (hopefully) the season and will (hopefully) return in (hopefully!! Scrubs!! Alias!?!?!) the Fall.

Yup. It's cliffhanger ending time!! So, I thought I'd give a rating (out of 10) for my favorite shows' season enders: Do I have to say SPOILERS PEOPLE!!!
(I'll type 'em as they come to me)

1. Grey's Anatomy - 7/10. T'ain't nothing wrong with a sudden wife's appearance during a romantic couple's date, right?
2. Lost - 9/10. OK, quite a number of loose ends were taken care of (but the monster's caused more questions) and we did see another character die (and yes he has been around since the beginning of the series!!). They blew the hatch open, Charlie's got drugs again, Walt's been kidnapped and Sawyer's been -presumably- shot and left for dead. C'mon September!!
3. Scrubs - 6/10. Honestly, I can't remember how it ended. I think Eliot left to work at another hospital, so...
4. Desperate Housewives - 8/10. More loose ends taken care of and a bit of a "hunh?" at the end, so yeah I'll anticipate it again in September!!
5. Without A Trace - 8/10. Well, I think everyone was expecting a certain FBI agent to die (on the operating table anyone?) but that didn't happen. Instead, we end up with Danny & Martin on the wrong end of a hail of machine gunfire. Uh-oh. Potential death and destruction give it a higher rating over mysterious spouses (Grey's Anatomy).
6. Alias - 10/10. I thought, after last year's 2-year amnesia/Vaughn got married cliffhanger, that Alias would take it a bit easy this time around. Nope. After saving the world, Sidney & Vaughn take off for a bit, he says he's not actually Vaughn, their original meeting was no accident, a car slams into them, fade-to-black, What the Hell? Please tell me I don't have to wait 'til January, ABC!!!!

I think that's it for my fave shows. If anyone else has something they'd like to mention, please feel free to comment!!

OK, one more thing while I'm on a TV theme here...

GEORGE LUCAS:
If you're seriously thinking of doing a live-action Star Wars TV series occurring between Episodes 3 &4.... pleasepleasepleasepleasepleaseplease don't do a "Young Luke Skywalker Adventures" series. Take a look at the failure of Young Indiana Jones with the whiny/bratty Corey Carrier playing the young boy. 19 of the 44 episodes were about the whiny boy and the rest were really cool shows with Sean Patrick Flannery, which would be the equivalent of Luke at the beginning of Ep. 4.... Just don't... PLEASE?

Violent Crimes

Finally got a chance during my extremely late night last night to watch Quentin Tarantino's 'CSI' episode(s?).

Tarantino definitely has a "thing" about him with whatever he gets his paws on, eh? I think the first thing that comes to mind with Tarantino is music.

He always finds an appropriate song for any incident. And to this day I still get the "heebie-jeebies" when I hear 'Stuck in the Middle With You' and think of the one scene in 'Resevoir Dogs.' And I guarantee you, if you don't recognize 'Misirlou' by Dick Dale & His Del-Tones... you will. How 'bout 'Twisted Nerve' by Bernard Herrmann?

The music sets the story in some ways and in others DRIVES it. And you're left with a visual for, well, when I think of Resevoir Dogs, YEARS.

But in CSI, the thing that really stuck out to me was Tarantino's other gift: pop culture. Anyone else remember board games like 'Dukes of Hazzard'? Oh man, beautiful memories there (not just about George Eads being tortured either!)! Adding some pop culture reference (the Royale with cheese speech from Pulp Fiction or the Madonna Like A Virgin discussion in Resevoir Dogs) helps build the characters by adding a level of humanity you might not normally get out of these tough guys. When Mr. Pink waxes poetically about the deeper meaning of 'pain' in Like A Virgin, he comes across as a poet instead of a weasely jerk (which he actually was).

So it's the pop culture references that really stick out in this case.

So, yep, enjoyed the episode (or 2) and extra kudos to George Eads' acting in this one. He really suffered a lot in the finale and the suffering still seemed prevalent afterward.

Don't Get Married

I'm procrastinating from schoolwork, but that's usually the way it works. Too bad I have a Midnight deadline and it's 8:26pm...

I've been "over the whole Sex Caffeine saga for quite some time now. Our near-affair/potential disaster-complete-with-explosion has already passed the "2 years ago" mark. Our email messages dwindled after I left work back in October and I think there's been maybe a dozen since.

So, my daily-plus contacts with her have decreased to less than 1 message every 2 weeks.

Cool.

Except today I got a message from her about her upcoming wedding. I know I've mentioned the engagement --or at least the boyfriend in previous posts. It was one of the catalysts that the unhealthy relationship we had at one time was actually in "a good place" now.

But the wedding invite's done 2 things to me:
1 - It's a chance to see her how I've pictured her for quite a while.
2 - It's finally a chance for some real closure. To see her married.

The only problem is that the wedding is on my last day of the semester, so I most likely can't make it to the wedding. I'm hoping there's a reception or something.

I really need the closure right now.

Tick Tock

My wife's mad at me right now because I got mad. Not at her, but just mad in general.

See, last night I said I was having a late night (meaning 2 or 3am before bedtime) because I still had work to do before Friday. And I knew Thursday was going to be an unproductive day what with it being garbage day, my daughter's preschool day, and my wife was planning on getting her hair done this afternoon while my son has his "nap." So I stated that there wouldn't be much time.

My wife hates it when I don't come to bed at an early hour, but in situations like this, it's unavoidable. But, to alleviate any annoyance on her part, I promised to be in bed before 1am. Good compromise, especially since she said I had "all Thursday morning" and "a little while Thursday afternoon."

So, for my painting this morning I managed to get the garbage out to go before ten, but then had to wait until my wife showered, then I showered, before heading down to my office to get the painting done for school tomorrow afternoon. It was 11:30 before I got started and 45 minutes later I was back upstairs ready to convince my son it was "naptime" so I could get back to my work. My wife's hair appointment was at 12:30, so she should be back by 1:30, maybe 2 at the latest.

So, by 3:15, still losing the battle with my son, my wife walks in *finally* from the hairdresser's. I'm furious, and she's saying I'm mad at her.

Nope. I'm mad because I should've stayed up really freaking late last night to get my work done instead of relying on the "all morning" and "a little while" of the afternoon turned out to be 45 minutes in total.

Now she's gone to work (and not talking to me) until 9pm and I have 2 kids to take care of.

I leave for school 6am tomorrow morning.

Sleepless night anyone?

If I Were A Painting

Today's a painitng day and I don't mean around the house.

I'm painting a picture of a cathedral where one half will look larger and the other half smaller.

I've completely forgotten WHICH colors & contrasts make things larger and smaler though.

Crap.

Could be a loooonnnngggg day!

Asshole

This thing killed me a few minutes ago (oohh, like "real time" blogging) on Patton Oswalt's site about a recent show in Youngstown and I HAVE to share:

Weird reactionary moment: A young comedian dropped in to do a guest set on the late show. At one point, he made a clumsy joke about Third World kids making his clothes for seven cents an hour, and how evil that was, and a lady in the front row piped up: “Someone had to make ‘em, asshole!”

Oh, still laughing!

Give It A Name

Today's been a day of coincidental conversations. I'm just filling out a blog commentary on the origins of my nickname 'Hairyhoser.'

Dreama started it. So it's her fault. She & I were "classmates" through the University of Waterloo and after I called her a brat, she called me a 'hoser.' Well, being a little on the hairy side myself, the 'hairy' was soon added and the rest is history.

Dreama also said something about my "funny accent." This from the woman from Newfoundland, whose ex0husband mumbled something some might say cold have been English, but I never really figured out what he said to me. Hell, he could've been asking me about a ride back to British Columbia and I would've agreed simply because I had no frickin' idea what exactly he'd said.

Next thing you know I'm wearing a pirate shirt.

So, while I'm writing the comment, I get an IM message from Latina Lady. She has a question: "What does hairyhoser mean?"

See? Lots of questions and a somewhat simple answer.

Thus the legend of 'hairyhoser' is understood. I hope.

Ain't That Just Like a Dream

From a recent Blog Explosion...:

What Your Dreams Mean...

Your dreams seem to show that you're very preoccupied with your fears and problems. These bad dreams indicate that you need to spend more time on your issues during the day. You tend to be a very productive thinker. Your dreams tend to reflect your insecurities. Your dreams indicate that you have very conflicted feelings. You have a very vivid imagination and a rich creative mind. You secretly want to hide your dreams from your waking mind.

What Do Your Dreams Mean?

Everytime the Phone Rings

How bloody annoying is this?

Since Monday, I have received 12 calls from the same phone number on my cell phone. They've never left a voicemail message and I've tried to return calls to them to find out who they are, but to no avail.

But 12 calls without a message?

I've since added the number to my "personal" call display under the name "dduuuhhhhrrrrr."

Just leave a damn message already!!

Chewbacca

I told you to embrace your inner geek. 13 hours into Day #1 of Star Wars Episode III and I will be in the theater enjoying it!

Show starts at 1pm and my wife & I will be there with bagels tied to our heads!

Oh yeah!!

[I'm kidding about the bagel thing. I hate bagels]

Suicide Is Painless

Reason #7483427582345623478056082365784326527564738 why I need a camera phone...:

My wife is an electoral officer for the provincial elections today. EO's work in teams of 3 with one supervisor. My wife's "partner" is, well, she's....

Take Loretta Switt from M*A*S*H, put her on acid for the past 20 or so years, and dress her up in the zaniest colors ever!

And now you have an idea what my wife's partner looks like.

And why I need that damn camera phone!!

The Geeks Shall Inherit the Earth

Today a debate broke out in class. The teacher commented that the Death Star wouldn't blow up the way it did in Star Wars because there's no oxygen in space.

OK, a couple of points:

1. Not sure WHY you brought this up today, bud, but I think the point you were trying to make was that you can't hear anything in space, therefore, there would be no explosion. Please, tell me that's what you meant. Because if you start into a rant about there being no oxygen in space and therefore no way for the Death Star to *combust*, then we have a problem. 'Cuz all those people on board weren't wearing oxygen tanks now, were they?
2. Why -oh God WHY- would you dare even tihnk about starting a Star Wars debate in a class full of computer geeks?

Granted, we're all geeks. Every one of us. I know a guy, K, who could probably get some from a different girl every night if he so chose. He's got money, a very nice car, looks... and he plays video games incessantly and loves Dungeons & Dragons.

B is a pothead, but you an see the former athleticism abandoned after high school. Again, he has the looks and although he doesn't have the money, he has the drive to get it. He admits to being addicted to The Sims.

I'm not very athletic (I dabble), I'm very sociable, intelligent and if I had money I'd know what to do with it. While I can't (CAN'T) have a different woman every night, I damn well know how to treat them and treat them well (if you get my meaning). Oh, and I love comic books, Star Wars, and online RPGs.

But I will not, never oh ever get into a debate about Star Wars, Star Trek or be able to tell you which exact episode so-and-so boinked such-and-such an alien. Nope, don't care. Give me the story over the mechanics, thanks.

I don't let my inner geek shine on a daily basis. I'll show him off occasionally, when the time is right. Sometimes, it just ain't a good time.
and, yes, the few people I talk to who knew me a year ago can't believe they're actually seeing me (a more real me than I was in 2004). I've done the difficult in some ways:

I've embraced my inner geek.

Bad Trash

We got home last night around 9:45 to discover that although our garbage was gone, our toilet was still sitting at the end of the driveway. Yep, I'm officially a yokel now, because I have a frigging toilet at the end of my driveway.

There was a note on the ground a few feet away and it took three reads before we finally found the word 'toilet' listed amongst the "not permitted" list.

They'll take a fridge, but they won't take a toilet.
They'll take a television, but they won't take a toilet.
They'll take a dishwasher, but they won't take a toilet.

So, anyone want to guess what the environmental impact is of each?

I did a little bit of an internet search and this is basically what I found.

1. Fridges have PCBs. PCBs cause cancer, affects the immune and reproductive systems and many other problems.
2. Dishwashers have been known to cause cancer (well, through the heated chlorinated water anyway)
3. TVs?
   

Who's Going to Take the Garbage Out?

Today is 'Spring Cleanup Day' in town. It's the day on the schedule that the garbage trucks come out and pick up any crap you have to throw away. Yep, the broken toilet is now sitting at the end of the driveway, ready to be taken away.

I've always been.... unsure about 'spring cleanup.' Not the idea of cleaning crap out of the house, but just looking aorund the neighborhood. People have been putting junk out by the curb for over a week. And for over a week there have been old stained mattresses, broken TVs, rusted out barbecue stands, and, yes, cracked toilets. But over a week of this looks rather embarrassing, I think.

Another thing that bothers me about it is that there are items that could have easily been donated to thrift shops and there are 3 in town. One house (I know the landlord and he's been fairly patient in allowing them to stay despite the lack of a full payment of rent in months) had three 27-inch TVs in their trash. THREE. Could these have been taken down to a thrift shop, repaired and sold with the money being put to a good cause? Apparently not. And then someone came along and took them anyway.

Now, taking that into account, haivng this crap out for a week means there are scavengers driving around and grabbing trash from everyone's houses. Some of it's just taken away, but others rummage through and leave a bigger mess than before. And while some are seeing things they could possibly use at home, some people drive around and pick up every broken-down lawnmower or every TV. You know they're making money off of it, or at least trying to.

Of course, what I really hate is having our old toilet at the end of our driveway. Yick!

Breathe Again

OK, now that the latest Amazing Race is over, thank God Rob & Amber didn't win.

Uchenna & joyce played a classy game and I'd like to think most people were rooting for them because of the way they played. I mean, even at the end, neither was willing to run in, win the million THEN go back and pay the cab driver. Nope, they begged money off people and nearly lost the race because of it.

Classiest scene: At the final checkpoint, Alex (of Lynn and Alex) was praying "Uchenna & Joyce, Uchenna & Joyce, Uchenna & Joyce." Ah, the power of positive thinking.

So, maybe this proves to some people that people get what they deserve. When it came to the final flight to Miami, Rob was pushing to get on the earlier flight, screaming "Please, my mother." And it wasn't any help. They got on the plane by going to the gate, but Uchenna & Joyce basically just said, "Please, we need to get on that flight."

Here's a question: Who would believe someone being filmed by a TV camera is actually rushing in an emergency for their "mother"? Anyone? Anyone?

Just nice to know when the race was finally over that I could breathe again.

And no, I'm not watching Rob & Amber's wedding on May 24th. Media whores to the max.

A Strange Day

It's 2:30 and I've had enough of Monday already.

This morning I thought there was a hockey game on the radio, but instead the local sportsradio station had endless interviews with former Steve Nash coaches and friends & family. Fine, he's the first Canadian to win the NBA MVP. I get it. Sadly, I'm going to agree with Mark Cuban on this one: "Alright, we love Steve Nash... yadda yadda yadda."

Coincidentally, if you know anything about Mark Cuban, know this as well: He was my boss (from Hell!)'s idol and he talked about him all the time. That's enough about that, but it sure explains a lot.

So, aside from a lack of radio listenin' this morning, turns out I took 15 minutes to walk from my kitchen to the garage and was running really late. And you know the minute you're running late someone has to screw up the morning commute, right? The longest mile of the commute had 2 stalls and they were expecting long, long lines of cars trying to get around the stalled vehicles.

It wasn't actually that difficult and I even made it through the worst intersection in near-record time today. But then things totally slowed down on the freeway.

Anyone working with traffic laws in British Columbia, could you please make it a justifiable collision if the single occupant of the car ahead of you in the HOV lane is doing less than the speed limit? Pretty please???
I mean, really, what do you think all the honking and flashing of lights behind actually was? A parade perhaps?

Digressing... So, I'm in class and just a few minutes after we start, I hear a whimper from behind. One of the only women in the class is looking a little ill (a little pasty white) and her arms are shaking. I thought originally, she was just cold. But then her head started swaying and I thought she might be fainting.

You know it's a rough program when people work on projects for 24+ hours straight, so I thought maybe she'd just overdone it.

I asked her if she was okay and she turned and said "okay" while giving me the OK sign. But then I noticed she was still shaking and she could loosen her fingers from the 'OK.' A guy on the other side of her desk called the instructor's attention to what was happening and when he asked if everything was okay, she just repeated "okay." He went back to the lesson. I noticed that both hands were now formed into claws and she was still shaking a bit. Suddenly, she started to fall off her chair and I leaned forward just in time to catch her. The instructor saw this and I helped her lie down on the floor and shouted at the instructor to call for first aid. He ran out of the room to call and I just kept talking to her.

Eventually, the first aid attendants arrived and while I still wasn't sure if she was haivng a seizure or something else, I just held her on the floor and made her focus on my eyes. She shouldn't speak properly at this point either.

It turns out she was hypoglycemic and her blood sugar was incredibly low. She had been working overnight on her project and only ate a slice of toast for breakfast. I helped take her to the firemen who answered the 911 call and stuck around assisting while we waited for the paramedics to arrive. We got some apple juice in her and she started to perk up, but the firemen gave her a pack of glucosel, which is like a packet full of sugar rush. It helped her out, but when the paramedics arrived, they were pretty insistent on testing her blood sugar before releasing her back to class.

While I was gone, my instructor told the rest of the class that they're going to be the lucky ones if I'm in their development group for our final project at the endof the program in 2006. Why? Because I'm "a take-charge guy who has not problem giving orders to anyone." It turns out my instructor is a former US Marine and he told me later the last time he had a medical emergency was his foxhole buddy who'd been shot. He had a bit of a flashback --which really has to suck.

Anyway, she's fine but gave us a bit of a scare. I think she was worried that people might look at her funny, but I told her that everyone was just concerned with her, not about her.

Oh, and somehow I got my project done in class today too. Go figure.

Difficult By Design

One of the classes I'm taking is all about design.

Or, at least it's supposed to be about design.

The course reminds me a lot of math in high school. No, it's NOT math, but the question "how much of this am I going to use in my life?" comes to mind. We've spent 5 weeks now looking at masterpieces. Leonardo Da Vinci, Caravaggio, Rembrandt, Durer. Big names in art. And I should know as I took 3 terms of art history in college after getting 98% on the art history 12 final exam.

But the program I'm in has virtually nothing to do with 'design.'

So why are we taking it?

No answers yet, but I appreciate the irony that after 5 assignments I'm sitting at 100%.

Now, the instructor. She's something else. And I don't mean that in a good way. She's very condescending, she can be quite rude and she has an air of superiority about her at all times. With one assignment, she gave me suggestions on what to change as I was "doing it all wrong." So, I made the corrections and she lambasted me about the corrections I made. I did everything she suggested and still managed to do it wrong. Sheesh.

And then she gives me 100% anyway.

I'll admit now I skipped the last hour of the last class. Had enough for the day and had my next assignment. Enough already.

Rumor Weed

Had a drink "after work" with an old friend from work, Bean. I worked with her with my very first work assignment at the old office back in 1997, so definitely a longstanding friendship. She had a couple of stories to tell.

Drama Queen officially replaced me at the job From Hell. It was also the only way for her to stay altogether at the office as she failed miserably with the promotion they'd given her last summer.

Where's that 'No Shit Sherlock' picture I had???

Anyway, it turns out the department had received someone else in a transfer just a few weeks after I'd left and she's proven herself to be just as useless. Very good at wandering around and visiting people, but not very good at staying in the office and actually working. So, DQ comes back to help out... sorry, taking a giggle break... and that leaves The Boy with the rest of the work.

Poor Boy. I'm surprised he's still alive --or that everyone else around him is.

Bean asked me if I was ever offered a new position if I'd accept and come back. I simply replied that I had several nightmares about that happening. In other words, NO.

NO
NO
NO
NO
NO.

Book Smart, Street Stupid

Thanks to Madley for this one:

Your English Skills:

Grammar: 100%

Punctuation: 100%

Spelling: 100%

Vocabulary: 100%

Does Your English Cut the Mustard?

The Video Store

So, two homework assignments this week include DVDs to watch. 'Citizen Kane' and, believe it or not, 'Paycheck.'

Although I'm thinking right now my instructor was acting in 'Paycheck' so I wouldn't be surprised if that's why it was one of the picks...

So, it was off to Blockbuster with coupon in hand to pick up these 2 DVDs, but I couldn't find Citizen Kane anywhere. Wasn't in Drama. It wasn't in Family. It's not a comedy, so it better not be there --and it wasn'r. So where is it? It also better not be on their top sellers list where they can charge $5 for a rental. Nope, not there either.

So, I grab "Mr. Knowledge" from an aisle and ask him where they're hiding it. "I don't think we have it," he replies. "I've heard of it," he continues.

My jaw's already dropping to the floor by this point.

OK, if you're not aware of it, Citizen Kane is the most influential movie in history. Understand that? Not just an influential movie, but the most influential movie. EVER.

If you've seen it once, go out and get the DVD ASAP. Why? Because you missed a few things. You may have thought, "all right, it was an okay movie, but what makes it influential?" Get the DVD. Roger Ebert does a commentary track on the DVD. Ebert is basically the world authority on Citizen Kane and has even written a book about the film. Watch the film, then watch it again with Ebert's commentary and see how many times you go "Ooohhh. I didn't notice that!!" Anyway, cool movie. Great story. Unbelievably genius choreography.

And friggin' Blockbuster doesn't carry it.

Fortunately, they had 6 copies of Paycheck available.

Like A Movie

I've been inundated with homework, so my posts have kind of gone by the wayside for now.

Sorry.

Part of my homework has included watching movies (yeah, on purpose!). This week alone, I've watched 'The Last Man,' 'Man on Fire,' 'The Good Girl,' 'The Ring,' 'Collateral,' 'Citizen Kane,' and 'Assault on Precinct 13.'

I'll wirte a little something about each of these.... later.

Ironic

Get this: I have a writing assignment due in 10 hours. It's 2000 words long and I'm really stuck on it. It's about writing.

And I can't think of a thing to write.

It's based on a book called 'Story' by Robert McKee and we're basically looking at 8 points about 'Story' McKee claims:

1. Story is about principles, not rules.
2. Story is about eternal, universal forms, not formulas.
3. Story is about archetypes, not stereotypes.
4. Story is about thoroughness, not shortcuts.
5. Story is about the realities, not the mysteries of writing.
6. Story is about mastering the art, not second-guessing the marketplace.
7. Story is about respect, not disdain, for the audience.
8. Story is about originality, not duplication.

What is a rule compared to a principle? A rule is a generalized course of action whereas a principle is a basic truth. Rules in a story can draw you away from the basics, what you NEED in order to make the story work. Just because the rules of a story, or plot, exist does not mean that they have to be followed exactly. The basics are there, and they are there to be played with and worked to the advantage of the story. Rules make the structure, but following the principles allow the writer to let the story evolve without always following the structure the reader is accustomed to. Perhaps the main conflict occurs at the beginning of a story and it is followed up with the back story explaining to the reader how the conflict came about. Therefore, the principles still make use of the rules, but not in the easily recognized format. It is the same thing with the protagonist. The big assumption is that the protagonist is the 'hero' of the story and therefore someone the reader should look up to. His goals are the goals of every reader and that is how the protagonist becomes likeable. But if a protagonist has desires and an object of desire, could this not be construed as greed? Could that be seen in a villain, in someone the reader cannot empathize with? A villain then becomes a protagonist and they become empathized with and therefore alter the way the reader views his character.

Instead of following the basic formula for a plot, it is completely plausible to alter it in such a way to still have the plot flow but in a non-linear way. Again, the conflict doesn't necessarily have to be resolved at the end of the story, but could bring in the setting of the story. It is an opportunity to mix things up as it were and find a new method to intrigue the reader. If done properly, it can be quite engaging. If not, then the reader will be completely lost. I think 'Usual Suspects' is a good example of getting away from the formulaic style of a "murder mystery" but at the same time still flows through the basic plot outline. In the manner brought forward in this film, while the audience finally believes everything has come to a logical conclusion, everything is turned upside down again as the "killer" is revealed all over again. A formula means that everything becomes predictable and typical. The formula can bore the reader unless the writer finds a way to engage the reader in something different. Finding the core forms in the formula and adding them in an altered method can bring the reader in to discover the story as it continues.

Archetypes are the original design and stereotypes are simple copies of what’s happened before. So, the focus of any story is to be original. Why do what’s been done before? If you give the reader something new to think about, they’ll be much more engaged in the story than if it’s something similar to what they’ve read, heard, or seen before. The most important thing in a story is offering something new. Something that hasn’t been done before be that through the characters, the plot, or even in the style it’s been written. To give anyone anything else is cheating them out of a new experience. The stereotype over simplifies the design and can draw the audience away from the story. Again, if the story becomes predictable, than it does not entertain nor engage and loses everything in the process. The key to originality in an archetype can inherit itself from previous patterns, but the method in which the patterns are constructed can still make it original. Superman and Batman can be seen as the archetypal super-heroes, but even Superman was modelled after Samson. Batman, in a fashion, was modelled after Sherlock Holmes.

Thoroughness is another method of engaging the reader and assisting in the suspension of disbelief. Taking shortcuts cheats the reader out of the experience. Taking for instance a scene where Detective Jones walks into a murder scene. He could just walk into a room and see the body and the reader would get that. But with no tone, no mood or environment , the reader misses another level to the story. 'Detective Jones walked slowly through the doorway, the room reeked of death and Jones shuddered as he saw the blood covering the walls.' The reader can feel the shudder and could feel it even more with more of an in-depth approach. To be more thorough also allows the writer to bring about another level to the character that the reader may not have seen before. Detective Jones "shuddering" at the murder could be delved into further if it reminded him of his first murder call back when he was rookie on the force. More depth to the character then begins and events of the past then emotionally draw the reader in.

The realities of writing are the characters, the plot, the setting, and the conflict. All stories have them, but the approach different stories take are what make them unique. It would be difficult to have a story without a setting. Where would the story take place? To not have characters means there's no opportunity for conflict or real emotion on the part of the audience. Granted, a documentary can be seen as a story, but even a documentary on a country cannot help but let the audience understand the people who live there. Conflict brings about the emotion of the story and allows the audience to empathize with the characters. To relate to them on a more meaningful level. To not have conflict means there's no level of emotion for the audience to be drawn into the story.

Originality is of the utmost importance in a story. Even if it's a story type that's similar to something done once before, it could be the timing that makes it fresh and original. A film like 'Gladiator' is in no way an original movie, but it brought about a whole series of "medieval-style" films that have not been nearly as successful as the first. "Alexander," "King Arthur," and "Troy" have all failed to bring about the same emotion in the audience. It was because of the asuccess of 'Gladiator' that all the other movies tried to grab the same audience. Along the same lines, zombie films have really picked up after the success of '28 Days Later.' Most of the following zombie films also failed in their own way with the exception of 'Shaun of the Dead' which took the zombie genre and asked 'what would happen if no one noticed?' Just because something isn't popular at the moment does not mean that it's not the right time to tell the story. In it's own way, it becomes unique and therefore original.

'Respect your audience' has to be one of the most important rules of storytelling. I think of insulting one's intelligence when it comes to the story. It would be the simplification of a story that insults my intelligence. It's the taking of an idea and dragging it out into convenient plot devices that would insult me too. It's the originality of a story that engages the reader and therefore shows a level of respect in allowing the reader to gain interest. Writing is something that most people do for themselves and why would anyone want to show disdain for themselves? Yes it happens, but it may be a way to pull the readers into the emotions that the writer is dealing with and engages the audience to see the story through. In that way, it's giving a level of respect to understand what the writer is going through.

I'm going back to the "Shaun of the Dead" example here because it's a great example of taking an idea that (no pun intended) was being done to death in zombie movies. But by adding a comedic level to it and allowing the audience to see that Shaun truly felt he was having a bad day before he even realized that zombies were running amok and following him down the street. Duplicating stories that have occurred before cheats the reader out of a new experience. It's the same reason why so many sequels fail to live up to the original film. Ironically, it's the reason why sequels are made in the first place. The first movie is original, engaging, and popular enough to continually bring in an audience. The next movie is more of the same and not necessarily in a good way. It's a rehashing of the same idea. This can become even more of a ripoff to the audience if it seems the characters failed to learn from one story to another. The fourth 'Jaws' film comes to mind. The wife of one of the characters of the first film hears of shark attacks in the area and decides to leave the area --by boat. Sure, it sets up the story for even more shark attacks, but the originality is gone and the film insults the audience as the main character apparently learned nothing about sharks from the first few films. A movie like "Scream" becomes original because all the characters understand the horror movie stereotypes and mocks them throughout the film. They still die, one-by-one, but the characters acknowledge that they know enough not to get into the typical situations that gets people killed in horror movies. All it takes is a 'spin' on something that has been done before that can make a story original.

Oh, hey, look at that. I did it.

Oops!

I've discovered another one of my uncanny abilities:

eMail faux-pas.

An eMail faux pas is a comment in an email message that after sending it and receiving a repsonse makes you go:

Oops.

I know I sent a few at work and one of those my boss (one of the ones I liked) called me an idiot for sending it.

Historically, these faux pas have included:

ME: Hey woman, How ya doing? Haven't heard from yu in a while so thought I'd email ya and see what's up? Still married? ;-)
REPLY: Hey back. Nope we seperated right after Christmas.

ME: Hey, glad to hear everything worked out for you two the weekend! I'm surprised he'd be interested in that! You'll be the death of him yet, right? ;-)
(corporate) REPLY: It is with great sadness we announce the passing of our colleague...

And the latest...
ME: What? you're in California? Bitch.
REPLY: Well, my stepdad died on Friday and I'm taking care of my Mom with Alzheimers. Want to trade?

Y'know....

Sometimes it's a good idea to crawl under that blanket and stay for a while.

Long Line of Cars

Despite giving myself a 2-hour "cushion" for the morning commute, I was actually late this morning. I guess it was just one of those mornings when no one felt like going to work and just wanted to sit on the freeway all freakin' day.

Seriously, one stretch not more than 3 miles long took 30 minutes. There are 2 lights on this "bypass." Insane.

The good news is, after getting my uber-marks back on the assignments, I discovered the guy sitting at the next desk is from my hometown, so I immediately spoke of the benefits of carpooling. He's been taking the train in everyday (which is $6 each way) and has missed his stop twice because he fell asleep. I told him if he gives me $5 a day I'll gladly drive him in!

Whoo-hoo! HOV lane, here I come!!

Pipe Dreams

I'm not good with handyman stuff.

2 lawnmower fires and one lost lawnmower wheel, damaged nose cartiladge (from chopping wood), and a nasty gash on my forehead (washing the car) attest to that.

Remember the broken toilet?

I finally got around to replacing it today (we have 2 others so not as devastating as you think) and althought it tooks a few hours (and a nice slice on my right thumb), the toilet is officially bolted to the floor with tank in place!!

No water.

Apparently, the previous toilet's piping is about 4 inches further away from the wall than the current configuration. So that means I have to figure out if this is a job I can do or if it's time to call in an expert.

Guess which way I'm leaning?

All I Left Behind

I can't remember if/when I last talked about this, but I'm really looking at another spring cleanup to get rid of the numerous crap in the house.

Okay, crap isn't the best word for it because we got this stuff for one reason or another.
[I'm being distracted right now by my daughter who has somehow found at least 200 questions about pierced navels. Send help.]

So, back to stuff. I'm trying in vain to get my wife to go through the videos we have (there's about 300) and put all the ones she wants keep on a shelf. One shelf. It should be enough. She's barely watched any of the movies we do have and never seems interested in watching them at any point in the future. With me working on the computer seemingly 20 hours a day, it's easier for me to watch any I'm interested in over the computer either through the DVD drive or just a downloaded copy (I have Assault on Precinct 13 just waiting to be watched).
[OK, I've completely failed as a father. My daughter's in tears now because she tried to put her happy face ring in her belly button and freaked out when I said people don't wear such big rings there because piercing a hole that big would really hurt and probably make you sick with infection.]

Sigh.

So, I can see no reason to have maybe a dozen or two videos on the shelves. My daughter have a bunch because she at least gets to watch hers. Most of mine aren't "kid friendly" which means the only appropriate time to watch them is when the kids are asleep (and that's when things like this don't get inerrupted by a little girl wanting to know about navel piercings). So, why keep any of my videos?

CDs are keepers. I think I got rid of any I no longer wanted years ago and although there's still a few I'd get rid of, my wife seems to think they're less obtrusive in the house.

I'm still looking at how to get rid of the comics quickly and efficiently and of course, eBay knows my schedule and only plans cheap-listing days when I have no feasible way of listing all the crap that could just GO. My original goal was to get a minimum of 50 items a day ready for one of these super-cheap listing days, but with school commitments being what they are, it hasn't happened quite yet. I hated missing that 1-cent listing day as I would've/could've spent the entire 24 hours listing items to sell and sell cheap just to get rid of them!! Selling with a cost of 1-cent as opposed to 30-cents? HUGE difference.

I'm motivated to start scanning right now --If only I could get my daughter to stop bugging me about belly button rings...

The Meetings

If my life weren't filled with "due dates" right now, then at least it's filled with meetings. It's hard to believe I'm "unemployed" with the vast number of meetings I'm heading into and around right now.

I had 4 meetings last week: Tuesday night, Wednesday morning, Wednesday night, Thursday night (which went for 4.5 hours!!).
This week, and it's only Tuesday, I've had 2 meetings: Monday night and Tuesday night. 2 more tomorrow and then *hopefully* no more until next Tuesday when the nasty cycle starts all over again!

It's complicated.

Tell Tale Signs

I'm a firm believer that if God wants me to move in a certain direction, then there'll be signs for me to help point me in that direction.

Last week, I was having trouble reading those signs.

Getting the "NO"s I was getting in trying to get financial support for school really told me that the signs all said: "Go a another way. This isn't the road for you."

But then, signs started to show stating that I was on the right path --and maybe it was just a little more faith that got me going in the direction I'd been facing. I know, it sounds alittle obscure and might not make much sense, but bear with me:

1. My student loan came through in 48 hours when they usually take 4-6 weeks.
2. I was awarded a grant that the school will sign over to me if I'm in any financial difficulty next week.
3. I've still applied for various jobs to prove to the government that I'm not giving up the job search just to go to school, but willing to work AND go to school at the same time!
4. This one was the big sign: I got an email from a guy wanting me to end one of my eBay auctions early and just sell it to him outright. He even offered a fairly reasonable price. He asked about picking the items up as he's (somewhat) local (lives/works in Vancouver). I told him meeting near my school was basically a halfway point for the both of us and I'd be happy to do that. He thanked me and promptly said he could throw in a few other items to make it even more worth my while... because he works for a local video game company. The same one I submitted 2 resumes to earlier this week and was one of the reasons I opted to take the art program I'm taking at school!

How's that for signs?

All Kinds of Time

My wife & I are having our traditional argument over "time" again. I'm a night-owl and a 2:30am bed-time is not out of the question most nights. Granted, that's changing a bit with me back at school, but with Wednesday's and Thursday's free, I'm spending my late nights getting the "work" that I can't do on Monday/Tuesday & Friday/Saturday done when I have... TIME.

But you come to a day like to day where I get woken up and eat breakfast. I wait for my wife to shower (my son's abandonment issues are so bad that I have to distract him with Hot Wheels while she showers). I then shower myself and head downstairs. Last night (or this morning) I promised to come to bed a little earlier to catch up on sleep --acknowledging I could finish up the last "bit" of work on Thursday morning. It's almost 11 on Thursday morning now and I'm on the old ratchedy computer upstairs, not with my work on the computer in my office downstairs!! And my wife has gone grocery shopping while I (type and) watch my kids... and of course deal with the multitude of interruptions that comes with kids.

This afternoon, I have a few things to mail out, but instead of my usual "hour" of mail-outs, it's now going to be 2-2 1/2 hours as I'm now mailing anything US bound from Washington state. Why? 2 of 6 packages (so far anyway) sent to the US a few weeks back have been returned as empty packages, contents missing. The only commonality between the packages is the point of origin for shipping as one was headed to Colorado and the other to Florida. And I'm out $40 because these books have vanished! So, TIME to start sending them more secure, through the US postal service!!

So, let's say 2 1/2 hours for mailing, I figure another 90 minutes or so on the computer, I have to pick up my daughter from pre-school in 4 1/2 hours. That leaves me 30 minutes' more TIME this morning.

As long as I get my daughter ready for pre-school RIGHT NOW!!!

I just need more time!

I Lost It

So, I'm going to try and stick with my rule about not watching another episode of Amazing Race until Rob & Amber are gonzo.

Man, I hope it's next week!

But since we've had tapes in the VCR all week, I never realized the clock hadn't changed with Daylight Savings.

Crap.

So, I managed to tape the last 2 minutes of 'Lost.'

Double-crap!

I know how it ends...

Listen to the Pope

I'm not Catholic. Let me get that out of the way right away.

In fact, I'm so not Catholic in my upbringing, some would even say I'm anti-Catholic. I just say I'm 'not.' My family is definitely anti-Catholic, though. My grandfather was an Orangeman. I think that sums it up, pretty well.

To me, though, the death of Pope John Paul II is a sad day for the world. This man worked tirelessly to help those in need, no matter which corner of the world they were in.

Yes, people can criticize his views on safe sex/contraception, abortion, and divorce, but he worked for people, regardless of their faith. He even visited the imprisoned man who tried to kill him.

I've studied a great deal about the Papacy and it is quite easy to say he was one of the greatest popes in history.

I'll miss him.