Speak Up

This might not be as funny as I thought, but here once again is:
Top Ten Quotables from the past semester:
10. "She said 'I missed you like a retard misses the point.'"
Actually a quote from an episode of 'Drawn Together,' one of the guys was watching it in class and laughed very loudly when it was said. The guy beside him (the one we all find quite annoying) asked him what was so funny and he replied with the above quote. Annoying guy, thought about it and said:
9. "I don't get it."
8. "How's your bottom?"
Ah, quotable instructors. This was in our texture mapping (that's how the colors and images get attached to the 3D models) class. She wanted to make sure we remembered to do more than what you could on a first glance... like the bottom of a...
7. "Let me see your box."
Which went over about as well as asking about the bottom was asking to see the entire box.
6. "Say please before asking to see my box!"
One of the smarter students in class, she insisted that if you were going to ask, you might as well be polite about it.
5. "Check out his wood!"
Texture mapping once agin. The instructor was impressed to see some of us were hand-painting wood textures for buildings and such. Of course, she realized what she said right after she said, but before she could correct herself, one of the guys stepped and replied "Don't mind if I do!"
4. "She had to use your stick, she doesn't have one of her own!"
From life drawing class, Hottie McHottington (the one who got me to the wedding on time on the back of her motorcycle) asked to use my 'smudging stick,' which smooths out shaded areas. I started giggling when she asked to use the stick and one friend replied with the above when I explained why I was laughing...
3. "There's no polite way to ask a naked person if you could see their other side."
At the end of the semester, the dean had a good laugh when he found out that out of 200 drawings in life drawing this semester, over 125 were of the "gluteus maximus." He suggested I move around the room more often, which I had in fact done, but still faced a whole lotta butt. He then said I should ask them to use a different position, to which I replied with the above...
2. "I never would've thought that was a manhole cover."
Texture mapping again. The instructor discovered the perils of typing in 'manhole' in Google's image search... and, of course, having it projected on the screen...
1. "I'll put my glasses on to make sure I'm rubbing the right thing."
I had to leave life drawing class when the instructor said this. He was describing various neck muscles and where they intertwine along the spinal cord when he adjusted his glasses to ensure he was pointing to the right spot.

[20 posts to go....]