Presenting

I kinda-sorta-kinda have my schedule now for next semester, which doesn't start until early April. Most likely, of course, the schedule we get just prior to the beginning of the semester in April will be completely different than the one I saw on Tuesday. I don't have my official schedule yet because of an issue with my student loans for April.

I haven't applied for it yet.

I figure I still have 6-7 weeks and they only take a few days to process, but these guys at the school tend to panic about it and they make you do it in advance so they know they're getting their money ASAP.

Making me wait in line for 45 minutes to give me that information is not a good thing either. Wasn't my only bad news of the week, though. I also found out on Monday that the big presentation I'd been told a week earlier was "at the end of the semester" is actually on Tuesday, February 21. That's a whole month before the semester ends...

Oh, and out of everyone in my program... I'm going first. Yep, #1 of 25 people. I get to present to a couple Deans, a number of faculty and a few representatives in the industry and prove that I have enough potential to continue in the program and show promise towards graduating in September.

If only I had another month...

I've set up a shortish powerpoint presentation where I go into details about me, my work and what my plans are after graduating. I don't feel like I have much, but then I think about my "classmates" and realize I'm much better off than most of them. Most don't even have all their previous projects anymore. Not only do I have those, but I have some extras kicking around as well. I made some corrections based on the critiques I got from the instructors.

The other information tidbit I discovered this past week was what happens after we do our presentations. The Deans and faculty sit down and discuss each of us and where they see us fitting in to a specific course that starts next semester and finishes when we graduate in September. We'll all be in the same class together for the 6-month spread. Essentially, they split us into 2 groups: the "have's" and "have-not's," ensuring that all the "have's" look extremely good and build off one another and the "have-not's" may not cope so well. Basically, it's a 6-month group project. And right now I'm scared silly that one of the people in the meeting will look at my work and say "NOT" and them I'm screwed.

Being in the "have-not's" means that my idea will be 99% likely to be accepted and I'll essentially lead the class for 6 months. I'll lead 10-15 losers who don't want to do anything and will slack off at every opportunity, leaving me to either do the work myself or just get stressed beyond reason because no one else is interested in graduating and getting a career out of what we're doing.

But these people (the Deans and faculty) aren't used to someone with a college education and an ability to argue a point home. You want me in the have-nots? Well, get ready for an absolute shit-kicking because it won't happen. I'm in the Have's because I have the experience to pull their asses out of the fire when (not if) they get into the thick of it.

It's just like what people hated about me at my last job. No, I wasn't trying to make people look bad because I could anticipate where people would fail. I was just planning in advance so if someone dropped the ball, we could move on without too much interruption. Having 10-15 people who could potentially drop the ball and lose it along the way is not going to mesh well with my personality. Put me with 10-15 people who could lose the ball and see others be prepared to pick it up and run with it.... that's where I want to be.

And dammit, I'll be fighting for that on Tuesday afternoon.